Men are hardwired to push and drive and muscle through. Women by nature are more about connection, love and wisdom. However we both have both masculine and feminine powers and women have shown that we can do anything a man can do. But when a woman leads with her masculine powers and ignores her feminine essence, it can come at a great cost – lack of fulfillment, the pain of self-betrayal, exhaustion, burn out and even illness.

1. Ignoring Self-Love & Self Care

As women, we often put our own care and needs last. For thousands of years the feminine essence has not been valued except for giving birth and raising children, (which is, by the way a function of one of our most powerful feminine powers, the power to create and birth- either a baby or a project.)

As a woman, it is crucial for your success that you turn some of that love that you give to everyone else back on yourself, that you love yourself enough to take time for yourself to exercise, eat well, get a massage, have meaningful conversation and have fun. You can use your masculine energy to push when you need to, but when you balance it with love and care for yourself, the universe takes care of you, for the feminine is the receiver and the attractor by nature.

2. Saying Yes When You Mean No

As women, we often make others’ ideas and wants more important than our own. Sometimes, deep down, we don’t think we really have the right to our wants.

The way out of this is to start to identify what you want in small things and build up to the bigger things.

• Ask, What do I want here? for every situation. What outcome do I want? Where do I want to go? What do I want to do?
• If you don’t want it, say no politely. When you want something, ask for what you want with respect and love. Make it a request. Don’t wait until you are ready to explode to ask. And then dance with what you get.
• If someone asks you to do something, take your time, decide if doing this is in alignment with what’s most important to you. For example, will it take you away from time with your family, much needed time for yourself, an important goal? Put them off if you need more time. And if you feel in your heart you really want to do it, (not just because you think you should) by all means, give it a full yes!
• Learn to ask for help for yourself (at home and in business and life.) You deserve it. It’s one of the great secrets of success.

3. Buying into the Belief that Pushing and Muscling Through is the Only Way to Succeed

Many women think that to be successful in business, they have to work overtime, be on their phones and computers even after hours. They lose out on things that are truly meaningful to them, like spending time with family and friends, creative pursuits or just plain fun.

They don’t set boundaries and don’t do enough things to replenish themselves. This is a recipe for feeling drained, empty and exhausted. Because a man is fueled by testosterone and designed to push and muscle through, he can take on a lot more stress than a woman. Statistics show that women are 40% more likely to get heart disease and 60% more likely to get diabetes than men under the same stressful circumstances.

For women, doing things that have meaning, create connection and are fun release the powerfully rejuvenating and re-energizing hormone oxytocin. This is a woman’s fuel. The truth is, doing more of what you love and what’s important to you nurtures you and feeds you and makes you more enthusiastic and productive in your work.

Yes, you have both feminine and masculine energies and yes, you can push when you need to, but remember you will thrive when you learn to honor your feminine!

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